You might be a Harry Potter fan. You might be jumping up and down in the air because the new HBP movie is out and you can't wait to watch it. If you are, don't be offended and don't throw heavy objects at me. All I'm saying is: are you sure you've got your priorities right? Should you, I ask in earnest, be putting your loyalty to some imaginary boy (who's quite ordinary and temperamental, come to think of it) over your commitment to good cinema and literature? Should you, should you??
You might be in a mood to root me out from any tiny corner of the world and dip me in scalding hot water now. Or the iron maiden. But wait. Listen, at least, to what I have to tell you about HBP the Movie.
*desperate silence for five minutes*
I've been trying to think of good things to say, but the only thing I can think of is: Draco Malfoy. Tom Felton is deliciously drool-over-able, and boy, is he the only person worth watching in the movie! The others are all more puppet-like than they can possibly be in real life - so much so I'm actually wondering if David Yates thought puppets would be a cheaper bet.
Now I'll tell you what's wrong with the movie. You'd expect a screenplay to be flowy, and we all know it's possible for books to be made into decent films (Lord of the Rings, anyone?!), but this one beats all. Every time I watch a Harry movie, I think, "This is the worst Steve Kloves could do, ever!" and he proves me wrong every time. Every single time.
And that's only one thing that's wrong about it. You might be one of those people who like romantic comedies, or period romances, action thrillers, gripping dramas, or fantasy worlds - but on all of those counts, HBP fails. Please, if you have any loyalty to good cinema, chuck your ticket in the bin and go bury yourself in a Tolkien.
10 comments:
Foothra.
Psh.
That's what you deserve for selling your soul to Warner Bros. and Ms. Rowling. :p
About LOTR, I think the thing was the book was so good that the movie couldn't be anything but good. With Harry Potter, well, the less said the better I suppose.
@verun:
I didn't sell my soul to Warner and Rowling!!! Blasphemy, that is! :D
Less said, better, yes. Which is why this post is so short. I had a three page long invective in my head, all made up, but it wasn't worth it.
Foothras aside, the last line of your post indicates that there might be some hope for you yet. Might.
@harry-who-refuses-to-accept-his-identity:
Honoured, sir.
:P
I take back that last comment. Go down to Hell, as Swinburne would say.
It was amusing the way they conveyed Dumbledore's homosexuality - an interest in knitting patterns and touching Harry a lot.
maybe because i'm a casual reader (heck, I've only read the wiki entry of Deathly Hallows), but I didn't find the movie half-bad, though perhaps in a shady sort of way... noting for example how every puerile scene of infatuation cuts to Draco brooding in a corner as if he's the next Darth Vader.
daniel radcliffe was very dishy in the movie though. heh
Hey Traveller,
I don't believe you actually went ahead and saw all the HP movies...
After they destroyed Chamber of Secrets, forget about buying a ticket, I run over a 100 miles away from any theatre that shows an HP movie....
And I think they should call the movies Hari Puttar- adapted from the Harry Potter novels! :P
@all:
I'm touched. *pokes shoulder* :P
Post a Comment